Before I talk about my epiphany I am going to make an admission here that I have never made in public before. It is apropos to the topic at hand but very hard for me to type out and have here for everyone to see and pass judgement on me for my actions. I cheated on my wife. I had never cheated on anyone I had even dated when this happened. I had been what a good friend of my called a serial monogamist. I won’t go into the details because they don’t matter. Suffice to say that shortly after we were married I broke my vows to her. It goes without saying that I didn’t handle the situation well from start to finish and it culminated with me doing something I had sworn I would never do. When all was said and done I went home and confessed my sin to my wife and prepared for the worst. I expected yelling and screaming and even possibly having to find a new place to sleep for a while. What I got was forgiveness. It was instant and without second thought. There was no yelling, no banning me from our apartment. She simply and completely forgave me and has never once held it against me. Her forgiveness tore my heart out and made me feel worse than any other thing she could have done. Now this was not her intent but it’s the truth of the matter. It was hard and took me much longer to accept that she had forgiven me than it did for her to do so.

What brought this to my mind was typing out my explanation of how prosecuting people that tacitly approved torture are looked the other way would provide them absolution whereas forgiving them and letting them deal with their conscience could provide a harsher punishment in the long term. I realized, over the past couple of days thinking about it, that human beings have a need to be punished for our crimes or sins so that we feel we can accept forgiveness. It is hard for us to accept that we can just be forgiven for something we have done that hurt someone, broke someone’s trust, and so on. We don’t feel worthy of being forgiven without some of retribution being meted our upon us. Sure we can logically accept forgiveness as offered and once accepted we may even believe the forgiving party has truly let go of our slight against them but we tend not to forgive ourselves for the slight even after forgiveness is offered by the offended party.

In the season premier of House we watched Dr. House struggle to tell someone who was injured by reckless decision that he was sorry. This was not the standard Dr. House diagnostic mistake but rather a completely different situation that you’ll have to watch the episode to see. In the dialog with Dr. House and his shrink we saw that the root of the problem was not that Dr. House did not want to apologize out of arrogance but rather out of guilt. He did not believe he had any right to let go of his mistake and move on. He did want forgiveness but rather wanted to mentally flagellate himself over his mistake. An apology, even without forgiveness, allows us a chance to move past our mistakes. Once offered and if offered in earnest an apology places the onus on the slighted party. If forgiveness is refused then we must, morally, move past our mistake while taking care to not repeat whatever thing we did. I say that we have a moral imperative to move on because if we don’t then allow other’s to place baggage in our life that is not ours to bear.

Now I must tread carefully here because a simple “I’m sorry” is not enough for many situations. An apology should fit the circumstances and must be offered in earnest. If we wreck a friend’s car and leave them without transportation while their car is fixes then a simple verbal apology may be a slap in the face that requires it’s own apology later. When we apologize we seek forgiveness and as such we must be prepared to make restitution and if we are not then our apology is not worth acceptance. I do not advocate allowing apologies not given in earnest or not fitting the situation to give us permission to walk away from someone we have slighted.

Offering a true apology befitting the situation and doing so with earnest places us in a position where we can forgive ourselves for our mistakes. And that is the hardest part of forgiveness. Forgiving yourself. Human beings are not well equipped to forgive ourselves and, as mentioned earlier, feel a need for some horror to be dealt to us that is worse than whatever we have done to another. This what we must move past in our lives. We must learn to forgive ourselves. I don’t have any words of wisdom on how to accomplish this task but merely know that we must.

On the flip side of that coin we should accept apologies without reservation regardless of whether or not they fit the situation. We should dole out forgiveness with ease and do so truly and completely. We should be willing to give forgiveness without any apology whatsoever. If we do not then we create emotional and spiritual baggage for ourselves that will affect all aspects of our life. I know from my own life experiences that holding a grudge or stoking hatred in your heart will leave you a shell of the person that you could, and are supposed to, be. Holding grudges can lead to your immune system functioning at lower efficiency and put you in bed sick. I won’t bother citing the studies here because I am lazy but there are plenty that show that angry people end up sick more often than happy people. So even ignoring the mental issues that refusing forgiveness brings with it there are health concerns as well.

All of this metal rumination led to me realizing that we, as humans, have a huge amount of trouble believing we can be forgiven for our sins. Even once we accept that the Gospel we still seek ways in which to be punished for our sins. I don’t doubt you heard all the Evangelical blow hards after 9/11, the major typhoon, hurricanes Ike and Katrina, or any other given disaster claiming that those events were God’s punishment because we are evil people who deserve bad things. I tell you that those blow hards have it wrong. They want those things to be true because it would mean that being forgiven comes with a price but it doesn’t. Scripture says that God disciplines his children but it never says he tosses horrors down from heaven on believers and non-believers alike. God’s forgiveness is there for the asking and he doesn’t require us to flog ourselves or wear hair shirts to get it. We just have trouble believing that we could be forgiven that easily and that’s a shame.

Even if you aren’t a Christ Follower everything above the previous paragraph is applicable to your life. I am trying to write these pieces to be applicable to everyone regardless of their religious beliefs. Forgiveness and apologies are a key part of managing our personal lives and we should work on forgiving with ease and earnest, accepting forgiveness, and perhaps most importantly forgiving ourselves. If we practice these things then we will walk through our lives with a few more smiles and be more pleasant to those around us. Let go of your grudges, forgive old boyfriends and girlfriends, let go of your spite for your mother not being perfect, and let yourself accept your failures and move past them. You might not think it will help but I promise you it can’t hurt.

To do evil for good is human corruption; to do good for good is civil retribution; but to do good for evil is Christian perfection. Though this be not the grace of nature, it is the nature of grace. – Archbishop Secker

(Title quote by Mahatma Gandhi)

Tony’s post on torture got me thinking. It has been a long time since this topic came up in conversation and it probably won’t since it’s sensitive and inflammatory for most people. I had thought through and taken a position that torture, to a certain degree, could be justified as self-defense in the same manner as war. In my thoughts there were some lines, however hazily defined, that one shouldn’t cross. So I could support things like water-boarding or making Muslims stand around naked in the company of the opposite sex but would never support using pliers to yank our fingernails. I didn’t put much thought into any given method of torture but knew that I had a line drawn at mutilation. There may have been other lines but unless something came up that took me there I hadn’t firmly defined them. I was quite comfortable in my thought process and could argue my position convincingly. Self-defense is justifiable so all I had to do is show how torture could be self-defense. It was quite a nice position to take as it was easy to defend. This position was also one of the laziest positions I have ever taken. I did mental gymnastics to squeeze torture into the self-defense category and then stopped right there. Once it was self-defense I didn’t need to weigh it against my moral compass because I already believe self-defense is a moral act.

Then Tony posted the previously linked article which was inspired by Andrew Sullivan’s piece in The Atlantic. I read Tony’s piece and started evaluating my position and this morning read Andrew’s piece and came to some conclusions. But before I go on to my conclusions here is brief excerpt of Andrew’s article (which you should now go read in full):

…torture is not defined in law or morality by the production of blood or by any specific technique—that would simply invite governments to devise techniques other than those prohibited. Torture is defined by the imposition of “severe mental or physical pain or suffering” to the point when a human being can bear it no longer and tells his interrogators something—true or untrue—to stop what cannot be endured. That’s torture, in plain English.

and

But torture has no defense whatsoever in Christian morality. There are no circumstances in which it can be justified, let alone integrated as a formal program within a democratic government. The Catholic catechism states, “Torture which uses physical or moral violence to extract confessions… is contrary to respect for the person and for human dignity.” Dignity is the critical word there. Even evil men are human and redeemable. Our faith demands that, even in legitimate punishment or interrogation, the dignity of prisoners must be respected. Our faith teaches that each of us—even Khalid Sheikh Mohammed—is made in the image of God. To violate that imago Dei by stripping and freezing him, by slamming him against a wall, or strapping him to a board to nearly drown him again and again and again, to bombard him with noise and light until he loses his mind, to reduce a human being to a mental and spiritual shell—nothing can justify this for a Christian. Nothing. To wield that power is to wield evil. And such evil is almost always committed by those who believe they are pursuing good.

The four page letter to President Bush from Mr. Sullivan shed a new light on things for me. The stance on torture from a Christian perspective can, in my opinion, be only that it is always wrong. I don’t want that to be the case. My brain wants to think that anything that saves the lives of American soldiers can be justified. I am not comfortable with this position but that’s the amazing thing about right and wrong and that is that right doesn’t always feel good. A quick look at scripture shows up not only what Mr. Sullivan pointed out, we are all made in the image of God, but furthermore that our response to terrorists should be the same as our response to anyone who wrongs us: But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. Whoever hits you on the cheek, offer him the other also; and whoever takes away your coat, do not withhold your shirt from him either. Give to everyone who asks of you, and whoever takes away what is yours, do not demand it back. (Luke 6:27-31 NASB) and Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Do not judge, and you will not be judged; and do not condemn, and you will not be condemned; pardon, and you will be pardoned. (Luke 6:36-37 NASB). I could post more but I think those two verses alone show what our response should be personally and what sort of government response we can support, as Christians, in relation to any situation or even any attack on our country.

I am ashamed to admit my previously held position on torture. Maybe I could rationalize that some of the methods Mr. Sullivan takes Pres. Bush to task for are not actually torture, in fact some have been found not be under the Geneva Convention, but that would simply be rationalization. The methods used were not merciful, they were not doing good to those that hate us, and certainly were not loving our enemies. I can no longer, in good conscience hold my previous position that torture is a means of self-defense used during war time. I am not sure where I will draw the lines this time but I can say, with certainty that my previous position is untenable in the face of own core moral and values and thus has been kicked to curb. What can be justified in light of the scripture posted above I do not know. I do know that the acts committed by our soldiers and listed Mr. Sullivan’s article, for the most part, are indefensible. To be honest I might could see sleep deprivation as a humane method of extracting information but that may be my own desire to have some method, any method, of extracting information from our enemies. It may take a while for me to form a new concrete position on this issue and I probably won’t post about when I do since those things kind of happen in the background and I likely won’t notice but the process has begun.

I think the one thing that Mr. Sullivan and I disagree on is that the current administration should pursue legal action against those involved. I do not condone the acts and am honestly sickened by some of them but I do not believe that going after those who were not directly involved, and the military did that, with these things so far in the past is in the best interest of our country. I take the stand that these things happened and should never happen again. Those directly involved were taken to task over their actions and at some point the pursuit of retribution has to stop. Bush will never authorize anything like this again as he doesn’t have the power. We have no proof how much he knew, though it is obvious he knew some of the atrocities were going on, and at this point we hold these actions and decisions to be derided as incompetent, disgusting, and never to be repeated. We follow the same principals Mr. Sullivan espouses on the treatment of prisoners and we forgive Pres. Bush and the rest who were not directly involved and let this go down in history as a moment of shame for our government and military. Putting the men in governmental position in jail for these acts serves no purpose at this time and wouldn’t act as a preventative measure for any governmental official in the future. It would simply do nothing from those perspective but worse yet it would offer absolution to those who might have had a hand in these acts. They could serve their time and walk away feeling like that had paid for their crimes. We should simply forgive them publicly and without reservation and let God decide on a just reward for their actions.

I had a couple of other issues I wanted to address but this has become one of my longer posts and so those other issues will have to wait for other posts. I hope these political/moral/religious posts give all three of my readers things to think about and I really hope I challenge your views at times. I am not the best writer in the world but if I make the three of you think then all of my drivel here is worth it. And yeah I know this is a day late but it took longer than a day to get it all sorted into a coherent train of thought. Thanks for your patience.

bob_edwards: You can’t be both: a Democrat and a Christian
me: @bob_edwards I think that statement shows a myopic view of Christianity to be perfectly honest.
bob_edwards: @romeosidvicious Is God’s Word a myopic view of morality. I think you have an argument with God, not me. He wrote the position piece, Bible
me: @bob_edwards HAHAHA now you’ve made me laugh. The Democrats, while misplaced and ill managed, show more support for charity than Repubs.
me: @bob_edwards I could make a very strong argument, in the same vein, for not being able to be a Christian and a Republican as well.
me: @bob_edwards Party affiliations dont matter one way or another to God I don’t think. Republicans are just as evil as Dems, and both are evil
me: @bob_edwards Many devout Christians are forced to choose between two parties that are evil at their core. Why pick on one party?
bob_edwards: @romeosidvicious A major plank in Democrat party is a woman’s right to choose. Take up your problem with God.
me: @bob_edwards And Republicans have gone into war, killing innocents, without Biblical justification. Which evil do you want?
me: @bob_edwards Scripture, from a Protestant standpoint, doesn’t draw a line at one sin being worse than another. So both parties are evil.
me: @romeosidvicious I don’t support the Democrats by any means, don’t get me wrong, I just see the evil in the Republican party as well.
bob_edwards: @romeosidvicious One party’s official position contains a plank supporting baby killing: Democrats.
me: @bob_edwards James 2:10 For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles in one point, he has become guilty of all.
me: @bob_edwards According to scripture both parties are just as guilty. You have made the sin of abortion worth more than other sins.
me: @bob_edwards And that position cannot be backed with scripture. It is myopic and man made. Both parties are evil according to scripture.
me: @bob_edwards We, man, don’t get to pick one sin to be worse than others regardless of how emotional that sin makes us.
bob_edwards: @romeosidvicious A woman’s choice was made the night she had unprotected sex. Can’t punish the child for the sin of the father/mother.

This was one of those moments. Why are people like this on my side religiously and politically? This myopic view, that one sin is greater than another, is hogwash. If we want to be clear on it then we are all guilty and none any less than any other. Statements like Mr. Edwards made drive wedges between Christians and widen the chasm between us and the world. You all know I do not support the right to abortion on demand and struggle with “mother’s life in danger”. This man has taken one sin and made it into a creed by which he can judge the Christianity of others. Some people do this with abortion, some with homosexuality, and still others with things like the war in Iraq, and so on and on and on. What this does is allow us to feel superior to others. It also allows us to be secure in our belief that we are saved. The problem is that scripture is damn clear that we are not superior to our fellow Christians regardless of their beliefs on any given issue and that our salvation is between us and God and to be worked out with fear and trembling. Using various sins as a barometer to gauge the “Christian-ness” of others, in my opinion, is the sin of pride from the start. I can disagree with a devout Christian on the topic of pacifism and still be brothers with that man. I can accept that someone buys the lies and believes women will die in back alleys if abortion is outlawed and is struggling with that but wholly opposes the military conflicts the US is engaged in. None of these things preclude the people I mentioned from being my Christian brethren. People that exlude other from Christianity based on a sin or two they have raised to level not in scripture.

The quote above is only the start of the conversation. Much more has transpired while I have been writing this. I won’t post any more of it, the above is just illustrating a point, but suffice it to say Mr. Edwards is not changing his mind. I firmly believe that attitudes and positions like his are more damaging to Christianity than anything the liberals have tried to do or anything done to the church by non-Christians. Here is the kicker: Mr. Edwards is also my brother in Christ and as much so as the people he would exclude from God’s kingdom. I came to the realization a long time back that I wouldn’t be shocked about who was in heaven but I might be shocked by who wasn’t. So I hope that Mr. Edwards finds the love that is supposed to shine through us to the world and comes to know the peace that is given to us. I struggle with tought issues all the time and I spend a lot of the time thinking “There but by the grace of God go I”. I am a sinner and saved only by grace. I won’t judge the salvation of others whether they agree with me or not and certainly not based on US political party affiliation.

This is my Bible. I am what it says I am…
and I can do what is says I can do.
Today I will be taught the word of God.
I boldly confess:
My mind is alert.
My heart is receptive.
I am about to receive the incorruptible, everlasting seed of the WORD of the living GOD!!!
I will never be the same!
Never, never, never.
I will never be the same in JESUS’ name!

In the WOF movement it means something different than what it means to me today. John and other WOF preachers would, after a confession like that, teach us how we could get cool stuff from God. How we could operate God like a vending machine to get our Cadillac and house in River Oaks. I reject that idea outright. However the confession should be true for every follower of Christ.

So I recently had a bit of a clue-by-four applied my rather thick skull. I combined the idea behind that confession and realized quite a few things. The first conclusion I came to was that we, the visible Church, don’t worship enough and in general don’t place enough emphasis on worship. We see the evidence of our being created to worship throughout the Bible. It is not a concept that you find by digging in to scripture and grabbing your Greek lexicon. It is plain as day.

Instead of trying to convince people that we are created for worship I am approaching the topic from the perspective that is understood. I thought about studying out all of the scriptures proving this and posting a treatise proving that point. In beginning to do so I realized many better men than me have already done so and my own treatment of the subject would rely on their words as much as my own. Instead of doing that I felt led to try and start a discussion on how we worship corporately. We know why we worship: simply because we were created to do so but what do we understand about our worship as a community? How much emphasis should we place on worship in our Sunday morning services? Can we replace a lack of corporate worship with individual worship? These things are the nagging questions that tug and my mind. I don’t know that I can answer all of them but I do know we need to address them as a community.

First and foremost I want to talk about those who lead our worship. The lead worshiper or worship leader, as they are commonly called, and what their place in the congregation might be is important to start the discussion on worship. Let me state, clearly and strongly, that there is no single right way to lead worship.  The leading of worship should vary from congregation to congregation and even from time of day to time of day. The lead worshiper, maybe even more so than the preacher, should know the congregation and their collective place in the road that is following Christ and plan worship accordingly. In a young church, or a church young in its dedication to worship, it may be appropriate to do concert style worship with dim lights so people can feel more anonymous and being to open up and let worship flow from them. At an intimate gathering it may be that even an acoustic guitar is too much and a few voices raised in worship is the most humbling and honest experience. It is the job of the lead worshiper to take us to the place where our hearts can beat together in a manner such that we worship with all of our ability and love for God.

In leading us to a place where we can worship as body there is a fine line that our lead worshipers must walk. To lead a congregation to worship, pure worship, a lead worshiper must take people out of their comfort zone. This is no easy task and must be gone gingerly in a lot of circumstances. It is possible, in my opinion, to move people too far out of their comfort zone and they shut down. At the same time as the less experienced are moved out of their comfort zone the more experienced must be fed as well. I do not envy the position of the lead worshiper at all. It may well be one of the most difficult jobs in the church.  I am not arrogant enough to dictate how these things should be accomplished. I do claim to know that, based on the fact we were created to worship, that the job of the lead worshiper is to lead us to supplication. If that is not happening then the worship in our church should be examined.

Supplication can happen two ways that I see. It can be a learned experience in which we are taught by a lead worshiper or the Holy Ghost (I prefer the old school term to the whole new school Holy Spirit) to a place where we fully submit and allow worship to flow freely through us. It can also be a spontaneous, unlearned event like we see sometimes in scripture and is seemingly commonplace in the WOF movement. I would posit that the goal of our worship, both corporate and solo, should be pure supplication. A place where we have no choice but to allow worship to flow from us in a manner in which we lose our sense of self and submit completely to the awesomeness of God.

The true awesomeness of God is my next point in my exploration of worship. In Matt Redman’s Face Down (The Worship Series) he speaks of how we have taken a mighty and awesome God and degraded him in our worship. We do not feel the real glory of God on Sunday morning, or in a more general sense, we miss this in our daily lives. We take God and simply anthopormize Him so that we can feel like we understand Him. This has two very negative effects on us as Christ Followers. The first effect is that we we start to feel that we undestand God when scripture is very clear that we do not and can not understand Him. In fact the minute we think we do he is likley to smack us around a bit! Also in this anthropomorphization that we see in worship (as an aside I mostly refer to modern worship and not the hymns of yesteryear) we also deprive ourselves from experiencing the glory of God. This glory is such that people fell to the ground in the slightest presence all through scripture. To worship and not feel a sense of awe and wonder is to not worship at all. God’s glory, in worship, should flow over us and invoke submission and release in a manner that nothing else on earth can measure up to. If we are not experiencing this thing that is worship then there is a good chance we are doing it wrong.

The mechanics of worship is a much discussed topic and my thoughts on the manner is that there are many methods, positions, and mannerisms that are completely valid for us to give ourselves over in worship, Matt Redman, mentioned earlier, advocates checking out getting face down in our worship. I find this a laudable goal as that position is physical representation of the position our hearts and minds should be in for worship. But there are many other ways we can physically participate in worship. There are folks who raise their arms towards heaven in a standing position of surrender and there are those for who letting go means something as base a singing out loud. There is no single right mechanic for worship, especially in a corporate setting, but we should be encouraged by those leading us to supplication to participate in worship in a manner that is the most humbling and freeing for us. In fact were I ever to find myself in the position of leading worship, God forbid as I don’t think I could handle that responsibility, I would even encourage a shy person to hide their eyes and let loose in privacy even while in public. In fact if the only way, for whatever reason, for someone to find the freedom to worship was to stand against the back wall and pretend no-one could see them then they should be encouraged to do so.

The second hardest job of the worship leader, from my perspective, is creating an environment where each and every person feels comfortable in their worship.  However this is not the sole job of lead worshiper. Creating this environment is not simply saying the right things, having the lights at the right level, having the right style of music, and being someone able to lead on Sunday morning. Though all of those things come in to play in creating the environment they are the final pieces and create the physcial environment. The rest of the environment is the whole of the congregation and their attitude towards worship. This is set up from the ground up. The elders should be sheparding their congregation towards their hearts being in the right place, the minister (pastor, preacher, priest, etc) should be leading us to where we have a burning desire to feel worship flow through us. The lead worshiper then puts those pieces together for us and we can come together as a group and let worship flow through us. I can imagine a scenario in which God moves with such glory through a congegation that it creates this atmosphere but I think this is the exception and not the rule. As such we need to have the right leaders creating the right mindset for our worship.

Outside of corporate worship we should be worshipping in our daily lives. This should come across to the world as St. Fancis of Assisi stated: “Preach the Gospel at times, when necessary use words”. Our witness, our method of bringing people to God should be as simple as them seeing us live our lives. There are times when a more direct method is necessary but I cannot think of a better form of worship than to live a life that people see and know that following Christ is the center of your world. I have spoken of the way we end up appearing in the media in my other pieces and I assert that we can change public perception simply by living our lives in worship to the Un-created Creator. People will want what you’ve got if you live your life in this manner. It is the most pious form of public worship. Living a life in servitude to Christ will cause worship to flow from you no matter where you are.

Our private worship is another matter. How do we worship God when alone? Do we sing praises to him as David did in Psalms? Do we simply talk to him and glorify His work in our lives? The answer is that if you are living a life with Christ as the center you should be led to worship and however you are led is right for you. This is not a similar idea to relativism but a simple recognition that we are all created as individuals and as such will have different ways of worshipping. The point is not the method by which we worship but rather that we do it all. We should make the time, regardless of how busy, to worship God in private on a daily basis. I heard a song some years back that prompted me to try something and it was a humbling experience. In fact so much so that I highly recommend giving it a shot. Pray naked! It’s obvious why we can’t do this in our corporate worship but in our private worship the humbling experience of stripping off our clothes and submitting to God in our most vulnerable state is freeing in such a way that I can’t even begin to use words to describe it.

We don’t worship enough. That is clear to me. However it is also clear that we do worship because the rocks are still silent! I will tell you that we can worship more and better. I will also tell you that worship will lead us to places that are accessible in no other way. It is what we were created to do after all. So challenge your friends, challenge your church, don’t let people remain comfortable in their lack of awe and three song Sunday worship, get up and take charge of your worship. Cry out in awe, fall to the floor in submission, raise your arms in surrender. Ignore the atmosphere around you and let the worship flow from your every pore. Do this regardless of the level of worship in your church. Make people uncomfortable when they see you surrender to God. Let it be known that your worship will happen regardless of what’s going around you. Live for your created purpose and help others to do the same. The church is ours and it’s time to take it back! Take it back through unashamed worship, take it back through surrender to God. Show the pew warmers and lukewarm around us what it’s all about!

I did something a little different and linked scriptures throughout the article. I think it works well. Let me know if you’d like it done differently.

So how do I reconcile being a punk with being a Christian? Punk is and was about rebellion. Most people, ministers included, will tell you that rebellion is a bad thing and it’s not very Godly. I say that while rebellion in many circumstances is wrong that those who say it is always wrong are short sighted and have forgotten things like a certain set of theses nailed to certain door. I also firmly believe that all of our emotions are still intact after the fall but they have become corrupted. It is through God’s guidance and wisdom that we use these corrupted emotions for his good. We know, for a fact, that God is a jealous God and yet in most cases while we are still trapped in this mortal coil it is not good for us. I don’t want to get too deep into the theology of emotions but I did feel a need to explain my position before going further. So to sum up: Every emotion we have, rebellion included, was created for a purpose and has a Godly purpose.

I consider myself a punk when it comes to the church. I am not ready to accept the status quo and be a good little pew warmer. In fact I would like to see the status quo torn down and replaced. I am not speaking of any single church specifically but of the visible church as a whole. Denominations dividing us. Preachers spewing hate against other Christians. Congregrants whose entire ability to talk about God consists of bumper sticker witicisms. These things are what the world see of the visible church. I could blame the media because they decide what to show the world but better yet I lay the blame at the feet of the visible church for ever giving these things to show. If we did as we should, if we practiced unity in any real fashion, not the lip service payed to unity today, then the media wouldn’t have the freakshow that they get to choose from today.

So yes I am a Christian Punk. I am rebelling against a church that has allowed the name “Christian” to be drug through the mud. To be slandered by the likes of Fred Phelps. To be shown in the worst possible light. Furthermore I am sickened that around Christmas time we make a big play to “keep Christ in Christmas” and then we allow ourselves to participate in the commercialization of the date chose the celebrate Christ’s birth. This is just the tip of the iceberg. I am no longer content to watch people sit comfortably in the pews on Sunday and go back to their daily lives with no change. If what we believe is true then it changes people. I know there will always be some folks who don’t change but when the majority of people I meet are Christian zombies then something is wrong.

So yeah I am a punk. I am punk in the truest sense of punk. I intend to make a lot noise and make people think. Christianity, by definition, should not be comfortable. The Bible tells us that we will be persecuted for His name and if we aren’t being persecuted, and trust me not getting put up a nativity scene at city hall isn’t persecution, then we may well be doing something wrong. If we are only getting noticed for the crazies and not denouncing them so loud that the media can’t help but pay attention then we are most assuredly doing something wrong. If it takes bikers, who may or may not be Christians, to drown out Fred Phelps at a serviceman’s funeral then my question is WHERE IS THE CHURCH?

So I am not rebelling against God. I am rebelling for God. I am rebelling against a visible church that has become more concerned with feeling God than with saving souls or leading people beyong the initial salvation experience. I am rebelling for God. I am a punk with a purpose. I will be this punk until God wants me to do something different but until then I don’t intend to make to make the church comfortable.

When starting down this path I got to wondering what one man could do. I was answered by history and a look at Martin Luther, John Calvin, Alexander Campbell, Barton Stone, and many others. While I don’t agree with all of the theology those names invoke they were single men with a mission and they affected change for better or worse. I feel the church needs a good shake up. So I am gathering like minded people and am setting out to make it happen.

I pretty much concentrate on the aspects visible to the world in this little piece but the reality is the changes need to start well before the media ever sees anything. There are many essays on those things in my head. They span the denominations, congregations, and so on. There is too much to cover in one article. There may be too much to cover in bookshelf full of books. I only know what I feel God has called me to point out. I am sure there is much more than needs to the brought to light and that others have been and will be called to point those things out. Suffice to say I will be silent no more.

Eat. That’s my answer to the above question. When we get together with family we usually eat. When we go out friends we usually eat. When we invite people to our home there is usually food involved. When we celebrate someone’s marriage there is food. When we mourn their death there is usually food. And yet when we come together weekly to worship, minister to each other, fellowship and so we usually don’t eat and when we do we break off into small cliques and go our separate ways to do so. We don’t make breaking bread part of our communal fellowship. A better man than I might research when we left this tradition behind but I am not concerned about the when and why.

Our new pastor recently spoke on the topic of sharing meals. He pointed out that around a table we let our gaurd down. We share more than we do simply standing around. On some level the sharing of food opens up for the sharing of our lives. I think this is an important concept that has been neglected by many churches. If we look to scripture we see the Apostles eating pretty constantly. When Peter was shown that God intended salvation for everyone the first thing he did was go eat with a non-Jewish family. When the prison walls fell and Paul walked out prison to find the gaoler about to fall on his sword he ministered to the man and then went and ate with him. We see the Apostles gathered for meals in Acts. And yet, even in the Restoration Movement, the communal meal seems to be lost.

I see no reason why we shouldn’t give the whole idea a shot. I think we would learn more about each other, our needs, our desires, our fears, and so on. Apparently some folks think this is a radical idea. Something new. So instead of trying to convince any board of elders, or a minister, that something should be done I am doing it myself. Right now the whole idea is in the planning stages but I have made some contacts and there is intrest from some of the people I want to have on board. I am not sure this needs more than a rough draft to get off the ground but the simple overview is a fellowship on an evening that won’t interfere with anyone going to their own church. A meal of some kind (no catered or fast food but that’s personal preference). Worship, communion, fellowship, food, and discussion and not necessarily in that order. I envision an evironment where there is someone to organize the big picture and some folks to help set it up and that core group would hold each other accountable for their commitments. On of that group would have something to speak on prepared but the hope would be that it wouldn’t be needed as the vision is a place where anyone can share what they have learned, been shown, or just found cool.

While I speak of the meal here the main focus of the whole fellowship would be worship, communion, and fellowship in that order. The food would be there simply because it should. No boundaries on who could come, who could share, or any creed to stop us from fellowshipping. That part is a little radical but to be honest I feel the truth will stand up to any false doctrine so I don’t want barriers to keep anyone out. I see an inclusive environment where worship is the key and people from all walks can come together and share a weekly meal.

Of course it’s still in the rough draft stages but it’s coming together so quickly that I am amazed. I am putting myself out there on this one because I am the one stepping up and trying to make it happen. I am committing myself to this idea and doing so in a very public manner. When we get this thing rockin’ , and I have no doubt we will, I will post times, dates and places.

There are three people in my life that have either inspired me, guided me, or supported me that have led to this being what it is and me actually committing to it. I am guessing you can figure out who you are. I want to thank those people. (Yes Mr. Stellhorn you are one them). I also want to thank my wife for her support as I try to figure out how to make this work.

Tony Woodlief published an article that presents a take on Christmas I had never considered. The article adresses a subject that has been near and dear to me since returning to the faith some seven years ago. He speaks of the blood of Christ in this piece and while not the focus it brought to mind the fact that I rarely post on my faith even though it is becoming a more central piece in my life. I plan to change that and do so starting today. The article linked above only served as the inspiration for this post but it is well worth a read and I think some of you may even find it inspiring. Now on to my main point.

When I walked away from the Word of Faith movement I also walked away from the faith as a whole. I wanted nothing to do with God or much of anything God related. Upon my return to the faith, not the WOF movement, I found myself mired in the Restoration Movement. Aside from sound doctrine I appreciated the ideals that spawned the movement even if the execution is lacking. I have remained there and likely will do so as long as they will have me. But I digress…I found that in our movement and indeed in many other churches I have attended over the years that there two things in the WOF movement that seem to not have enough emphasis. As I am not a church historian I do not know if this is historically a Protestant thing or if it something that has slowly happened to the church as a whole regardless of the schims. Actually there are three things but only one is my topic here. They are: Communion, Worship, and teaching on the blood of Christ.

All I want to delve into here is the blood of Christ. Tony’s piece mentions it and it is something that has been on mind a lot lately and even got discussed with Chris on Christmas! So I feel led to post about the lack. I am not going to go into some strange sermon mode here but rather try and simply state that I feel that simple things like talking about the blood of Christ is something that should be done more. Greek word studies are all well and good but if the basics are ignored then we have a bunch of book-smart and yet ignorant Christians who may be able to interpret Greek but miss the point.

Suffice to say that scripture backs my position on the importance of the blood of Christ. You can look for it yourself (and yes I am purposefully not posting the references as it makes people actually do the searches and more information seems to be retained that way).  The hymn writers saw the importance as evidenced in the hymnbooks in the back of the pews at a lot of churches (neat segue into the worship topic but that’s Eli’s game and not mine right now). I firmly believe that the churches I have attended recently concern themselves more with actions than beliefs. An emphasis on actions is alright but if it’s the main focus your end up with the knowledge of what you should do and not why you should do it. If your beliefs are right then by necessity your actions will follow. (scripture backs that point as well, look it up!)

I challenge my friends to think about this and to take a good hard look at what you are being taught whilst warming the pews and see where the emphasis is in your church. Do your own study on the blood of Christ and its importance. Should you choose to accept my challenge I have a feeling your study will lead you in amazing directions! I don’t think any two of you will even be led down the same study path. God has this weird way of taking our study in a direction where we need it to go in spite of our intentions.

For those who have never noticed that I am a Christian. SURPISE! I am actually sorry if you never knew. I am still the same guy. Still the same music. Still the same favorite beer and small batch whiskey (maybe in smaller quantities these days).  I am simply putting my faith out there. I will still go to a show and knock back a Lone Star with you any night I can get out of the house. I should have made this a more central piece of my life a long time ago.